oh life

well people.. it has been quite the last few weeks..life has been so full of ups and downs i just never know what the next day will bring...

at the beginning of break i was on one of the highest highs possible.. its hard to believe i wasn't even smokin anything to be this high.. lol.. so happy.. so satisfied with where i was at..

and then BAM.. spring break....

HAWAII!!!

not complaining AT ALL about the whole being in Hawaii thing.. it was one of the best weeks i've had in a long time.. spent the whole break jumping off cliffs..swimming into lava tubes [attempting to kill myself maybe? anyway it sure was suicide swimming in there]
THOUGHT I WAS GONNA MEET MY MAKER
riding mopeds.. which was a blast.. i think a may get one..SOON..
and cruzin with friends.. just livin the Hawaiian way of life..
but then BAM...
bad started with finding out a friends little 10 year old brother killed himself.
HOW do you know at the young age of 10 that life is just too hard to deal with and you want it to end? when i was 10 i'm pretty sure i was concerned with what we were having for snack that day... this world is so full of darkness and it hurts to see...we need to see Gods light.. and soon.

then bad got a little worse as i started struggling with where i was at in life with one of my best friends.. so i decided to take a break from that person and see where God is really directing me.. can i just say this has been one of the hardest things i have ever had to do? and the worst part is that I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!! God.. please direct me and open my eyes..

then bad got a little better because i ran and completed my first 1/2 marathon!! 13.1!!! BAM!
BUT there always have to be a bad side to things.. and....i injured my knee and i am still in pain after 9 days.. WHY? so i'm headed to the DR. tomorrow for him to tell me what i did:( pray for speedy healing because i have alot coming up that i need to be 100% for...

oh and to top it all off.. the people my roommate and i were planning on living with next year.. ya.. well they dumped us.. i feel so kicked to the curb it isn't even right.. ok not that bad but i have NO idea what next year holds for me.. its going to be a rollercoaster ride i think.

so that has been my past few weeks.. full of ups and downs and round and rounds..

i just continue to pray that God will show me his ultimate plan for my life...because right now.. i'm at a loss...